I grew up in church. I grew up knowing all the songs. I grew up memorizing verses. At age eight I could answer any adults questions about salvation perfectly. But I was not saved. When I was 13 I finally understood God's love for me in a real way. And I accepted him as my savior. However, I still didn't connect His words and His songs to my daily life.
I was thinking about that today. For so long I would listen to worship music as just words. As words that praise God, but just good things to say. Kind of like this. If you mis-stepped and almost fell off of a cliff or tall building but someone reached out at the last second, your thank you would have a lot more meaning than saying thank you because your date paid for your dinner. Well for so long whenever I would praise God it was like I was thanking Him for my dinner. It was something that he didn't have to do but He was supposed to do. It was nice, but didn't really consume my heart as life changing.
And it is SO easy to do that! We sing the same words every week. We know them by heart. We honestly are thanking God but kind of half heartily. Like we thank our parents for giving us a place to live. Like God is somehow obligated to save us. I think of a couple of songs playing on the christian radio circuit as an example of what I experienced in my own life. They are "What Faith Can Do" by Kutless and "One Thing Remains" by Jesus Culture.
The Kutless song goes like this, and I know most of you have probably sang it at one time.
I've seen dreams that move the mountains
Hope that doesn't ever end
Even when the sky is falling
And I've seen miracles just happen
Silent prayers get answered
Broken hearts become brand new
That's what faith can do
That's what faith can do. But what are you thinking about when you sing this song. Do you really believe it? Have you really seen it? It took quite an experience in my life to really see it. I can honestly say that I have seen a hope that doesn't end even when the sky is falling. I've seen miracles just happen. I've see silent prayers get answered. And I am SO blessed to have seen that! But this blog isn't about focusing on God more during songs, it's about truly experiencing faith. Have you truly experienced faith? Have you experienced that hope that doesn't ever end even when the sky is falling? My favorite line in this song is also one of my favorite verses. "If anyone is in Christ he is a new creation. The old has passed away, behold, the new has come" - 2 Corinthians 5:17. I have seen broken hearts become brand new countless times, but I want to share the story of one of these amazing times. So maybe you can see it for yourself.
Most of you know my story. If not here is a link. http://www.mercyministries.org/news/54/2012/01-31/six-more-mercy-graduates-celebrate-freedom so I am going to tell the story of my dear friend, one of the most amazing people I have ever known. And also a Mercy sister.
I met her in the fall of 2011. I was taking care of myself at a rehabilitation/discipleship facility in CA and she was just coming in. I had already been there for a few months and had already seen amazing changes in my own life. This girl walked through the doors angry and hopeless. She was the definition of a broken heart. She had gone through a life of all kinds of terrible abuse from her own father and her mom was as deadbeat as well. She tried her best to raise her younger brother. Eventually things got so unbearable that she turned to eating disorders and drugs to try and get control of her life. But it just ran her into the dirt. She was hopeless. She had nothing. She had been hospitalized for suicide attempts. I knew God could reach her but I never dreamed He would reach her in such a big way that He did.
She put up a HUGE fight but God got to her heart. They wrestled for a long time but God won, and gently loved on her. It hasn't been an easy road but God did not give up on her. He is a part of her soul and mind and walks with her. Today this girl is a beautiful woman of God. Her heart is brand new! She can trust people. She can love people. Silent prayers were answered. Her heart is beautiful and new.
This same thing happened to me. When was the last time you truly experienced God? When was the last time you trusted Him with everything you had? I am a very stubborn person and it took me quite a long time to recognize that God was worth my trust and I had to go through hell and back to realize that He is ALL I have and ALL I need. When was the last time you put everything else aside and trusted Him? Jerimiah 29:12-13 says " Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. 13 You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart."
God will be there for you. When was the last time you sought after Him with your whole heart? It's not easy. And it's not going to happen everyday. But it is so worth it. And I don't mean seek after Him as in just reading your Bible and praying (even though those are GREAT places to start), I mean to seek after Him in EVERYTHING you do. If it's sitting out in the yard and yelling, do that! If it's writing a song do that. Just connect. Reach out, truly, with your heart. I want to end with a few words of encouragement as you start on this journey. From a song:
Your love never fails it never gives up it never runs out on me
God's love never fails. It will never run out on you. If you reach out to Him, He will come to you. His love will never run dry for you. He loves you.
Friday, August 24, 2012
Thursday, August 2, 2012
What are you worth?
I know I said I would be answering questions but it turns out, You guys aren't asking many questions. So I am going to post something I have been recently thinking about due to a friend's Facebook post. Worth. A friend of mine posted a list of what he thought to be the 10 prettiest girls he was friends with on Facebook. Now, all of these girls were very beautiful; but it got me thinking, what makes a girl number 10 versus number 1? And what about the girls not on the list? Are those girls worth less? Should we all strive to be number 1? What determines what we are worth?
So ask yourself this question, "What am I worth?" This is a really hard question to answer, especially as a girl. If you aren't on some list, where do you belong. I spent most of my life wrestling with this question. I learned from a very young age as many of us wrongly do, that my worth came from what people thought of me. If I sang really loud during Sunday school, or if I studied hard to get good grades people would love me. And to the best of my knowledge, their love and praise was what I was worth. After all, the people on TV were only as good as people thought of them, so I thought the same was true with me. I tried my best to earn as much approval as possible, so I would be worth more to people.
As I got older, boys came into the equation. My worth stopped coming from what adults thought of me to what boys thought of me. Now, I have never been a particularly good looking person. I am very average. I've never been a model. So, knowing I would never be approved of by the typical group of guys in middle and high school; I would pick one to go after and do everything I could to be the perfect person for him. Sometimes that would be dressing "sexy", joining the clubs he was in, or doing anything I could that I thought he would like. As long as some guys were happy with me, I was worth something, Obviously not as much as those beautiful girls but still worth something.
My senior year of high school I got my first real boyfriend. He came up to me in class and asked me out on a date, just us. We had been friends before but for the first time, someone liked me. I started trying to do anything and everything to get him to like me even more and to keep him from leaving me for someone better. Someone who had made the list of prettiest girls. I thought I was only worth something if he loved me. Well this was not a good thought to have. There were some days where we were happy and together but some days we didn't get along. So my self worth went up and down like a roller coaster ride.
It wasn't until I got into some really bad life situations that I realized I had no self worth. I wasn't worth anything. I had pushed everyone away. But it was at this time that God was able to show up. God showed up and started to tell me what He thought about me. He told me that He made me beautiful. He told me that He had a plan for me. He told me that He loved me NO MATTER WHAT. And slowly I began to realize that my worth is the worth that my creator gave to me. Think about it like this.
A twenty dollar bill. Who determines what that piece of paper is worth? Someone who didn't know what it was might think it was only as good as toilet paper. Someone with millions of dollars might think that it is worth nothing. Someone in a poor country might think it is worth a new house. But what really determines the worth of that dollar is the amount that the dollar's creator put on it. The same goes for you and me. Our worth comes from the mark our creator put on us. So what does God think of us. Check this out: (from restoredbyloveministries.org)
GOD ADORES YOU!You might not think you are anything special but you are more special than you can even imagine to God. God sent his Son, Jesus to die for each and every one of us (Romans 5:8). He died and rose again so that we could be free and forgiven (1 Peter 3:18) from the mistakes we make. It is so hard at times as a teen and even for some adults to acknowledge that God's love is so much greater than any love any human being(including a guy you might be dating!) can give us. Sometimes we get so tied down by what people think and we let it eat away at our hearts. But what God thinks is what matters and He thinks YOU ARE SPECIAL! He loves you with an everlasting love and it's through the understanding and acceptance of His love for us that we find freedom. Let me let you in on a secret....Even when you feel you can't go to anyone on this earth, Jesus wants to be your bestfriend, and he qualifies for the greatest bestfriend you could EVER have. He wants to sit with you when you are hurting. (Psalm 34:18) He wants you to tell him everything you are feeling. (Psalm 10:17-18) He knows it all already so you might as well tell him about it, right??? He will not turn away from you and leave you abandoned. He wants a personal relationship with you because you are His most prized possession!(1 John 4:9-10)
You are beautiful and you are worth SO MUCH!!!!
So ask yourself this question, "What am I worth?" This is a really hard question to answer, especially as a girl. If you aren't on some list, where do you belong. I spent most of my life wrestling with this question. I learned from a very young age as many of us wrongly do, that my worth came from what people thought of me. If I sang really loud during Sunday school, or if I studied hard to get good grades people would love me. And to the best of my knowledge, their love and praise was what I was worth. After all, the people on TV were only as good as people thought of them, so I thought the same was true with me. I tried my best to earn as much approval as possible, so I would be worth more to people.
As I got older, boys came into the equation. My worth stopped coming from what adults thought of me to what boys thought of me. Now, I have never been a particularly good looking person. I am very average. I've never been a model. So, knowing I would never be approved of by the typical group of guys in middle and high school; I would pick one to go after and do everything I could to be the perfect person for him. Sometimes that would be dressing "sexy", joining the clubs he was in, or doing anything I could that I thought he would like. As long as some guys were happy with me, I was worth something, Obviously not as much as those beautiful girls but still worth something.
My senior year of high school I got my first real boyfriend. He came up to me in class and asked me out on a date, just us. We had been friends before but for the first time, someone liked me. I started trying to do anything and everything to get him to like me even more and to keep him from leaving me for someone better. Someone who had made the list of prettiest girls. I thought I was only worth something if he loved me. Well this was not a good thought to have. There were some days where we were happy and together but some days we didn't get along. So my self worth went up and down like a roller coaster ride.
It wasn't until I got into some really bad life situations that I realized I had no self worth. I wasn't worth anything. I had pushed everyone away. But it was at this time that God was able to show up. God showed up and started to tell me what He thought about me. He told me that He made me beautiful. He told me that He had a plan for me. He told me that He loved me NO MATTER WHAT. And slowly I began to realize that my worth is the worth that my creator gave to me. Think about it like this.
A twenty dollar bill. Who determines what that piece of paper is worth? Someone who didn't know what it was might think it was only as good as toilet paper. Someone with millions of dollars might think that it is worth nothing. Someone in a poor country might think it is worth a new house. But what really determines the worth of that dollar is the amount that the dollar's creator put on it. The same goes for you and me. Our worth comes from the mark our creator put on us. So what does God think of us. Check this out: (from restoredbyloveministries.org)
GOD ADORES YOU!You might not think you are anything special but you are more special than you can even imagine to God. God sent his Son, Jesus to die for each and every one of us (Romans 5:8). He died and rose again so that we could be free and forgiven (1 Peter 3:18) from the mistakes we make. It is so hard at times as a teen and even for some adults to acknowledge that God's love is so much greater than any love any human being(including a guy you might be dating!) can give us. Sometimes we get so tied down by what people think and we let it eat away at our hearts. But what God thinks is what matters and He thinks YOU ARE SPECIAL! He loves you with an everlasting love and it's through the understanding and acceptance of His love for us that we find freedom. Let me let you in on a secret....Even when you feel you can't go to anyone on this earth, Jesus wants to be your bestfriend, and he qualifies for the greatest bestfriend you could EVER have. He wants to sit with you when you are hurting. (Psalm 34:18) He wants you to tell him everything you are feeling. (Psalm 10:17-18) He knows it all already so you might as well tell him about it, right??? He will not turn away from you and leave you abandoned. He wants a personal relationship with you because you are His most prized possession!(1 John 4:9-10)
You are beautiful and you are worth SO MUCH!!!!
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